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Tuesday, October 30, 2007

The Sex appeal and First Move

This entry is inspired by Kenny and Nicole for their entries (for HUGO's latest Perfume) on

Should a girl ask the guy for his number? Who should make the first move ( Kenny's),

Is It True That Girls Fall In Love With Their Hearts And Guys Fall In Love With Their Eyes? ( Once again, Kenny's ) and

Is it True That Girls Fall in Love with Their Hearts and Guys Fall in Love with Their Eyes?
( Nicole's )

Well, there are few more entries on those topics but i'm not gonna link all of them. You can read from the links above.

This is from myself about Sex appeal and the "Should the girl do it? or Should the guy do it".

It really depends on individual but I will certainly give thumbs up for any guy or girl who make the first move.

First impression is, of course, needless to say really important. I don't believe anyone who said look doesn't matter. The one who said that is either blind or lying. ( We don't include those who was already in love but was unfortunely disfigured by accidents. Their love are sacred. Yes, I said SACRED, so you cannot compare theirs with others. )

On my part, I will freak out when guys approach me. Really.

I also won't be the first one to take action either.

I dunno why, every time when a guy made his moves i would suddenly shrink so small and would try to avoid the guy anyway i could : phone calls, hang out, dinners, even if he's my friend and i actually had some affection for him (not in the loving way, but in a friendly likable manner). It's not about the person. It's my instinct. It would acted on its own and i would suddenly feel, somewhat, afraid of that person.

Time after time, i did it to all my pursuers, some who happened to be my friends, but that's so long ago. I'm too old for pursuers now. haha...

I remembered i once had a crush on someone in my class. I'm not embarrassed to say it now. My feelings started after he actually stopped making moves to woo me. I guessed i have slow reaction to stuff like these. For those few months, he was everything that i thought about everyday. I made lots of excuses to go to his house just to see him, even during holidays. haha...

Sometimes, i would just call him up just to hear his voice, then pretending to ask him if he have any program for the day and i wanted to tag along. haha... ya, very lame, i know.

Then, there was one time, we were in this history class and the teacher was explaining the topic of the day to us while walking around the class. I was paying attention to her explanations and my gaze followed her while she was walking around. Without realising it, the teacher walked pass his seat. For this one exact moment, our eyes met.

Suddenly, i could hear my heart beating, thumping like there's no tomorrow. It was just this one fraction of a section that we looked at each other, and then we both looked away. I didn't know what was on his mind, but adrenalin was pumping within me. I think what i felt was first love. At least i thought so, coz i never felt that way again. I even had dreams of him. I guess you know how much i was into him then, but that was, too, long time ago. It's all history now.


Feelings grow with each day of get-together. Each moment spend, is a chance for us to know a person more. It's not a one moment-hit thingy.

All my relationship starts from friends. Mutual friends. There wasn't any intentional courtship, it just grew out of the friendship. It definitely felt awkward initially. From friends aka brathahood to boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. Everything about relationship is never easy. NEVER.

I like this comment from one of Kenny's reader:

As for certain stereotypes of guys who are are always complaining and whining about how they cannot get a girlfriend or a partner, STOP fucking whining and maybe DO SOMETHING for a change? Like.. actually MAKING THE MOVE? Dumbass. You know what your problem is and how to solve it. If you don't do anything about it, your loss. You've got no sympathy from any of us females.

Way to go woman.

There's even more to it.

For example :

Sad, depressed, timid, clingy, desperate little Peter may have an obvious crush on a female; and yes he agrees with everything she has to say. But sexy, confident Johnny has the GUTS to ask her out; and that really makes all the difference. People are wrong: The size of a man's penis is unimportant. What matters is how big his balls are.


So for guys who are always only *THINKING* of making the first move but NEVER seem to get there, maybe its time to actually PUT your balls in your pants and USE THEM for once.


Applause for Alicia

LOL.

I guess all Kenny's reader like to talk about balls too, hey?

Some comments are funny but true.

I say it's an equal fair share. I actually agree that at times women should make the first move. i've done it and i'm still stuck with the person.


Well, that doesn't mean the men get to sit back and kick off their shoes and hope to God a woman asks him out. Please do the poor woman a favour and drop some hints. For example, a smile instead of a killer come hither cover line macho look. Applies for women too (not the macho part). Batting your eyelashes or making sure you're pretty like a hindi movie doesn't exactly make it clear to men so both ways if you're interested with the right signals and no not by scaring someone with a bad come hither look it might just work. so i guess at the end it depends who's got the courage to make the first move after dropping them hints.

Batting eyelashes like a hindi movie.. lol...


Guys should make the first move. That's how it has always been and its more romantic that way. Since all girls dream about are being the princesses in some fairy tale with prince charming proposing.
And are you sure about guys not gossiping with his friends that a girl has just asked him out? I'm sure guys with their super huge ego will go boast around that a girl had just hit on him..a hot one that is.
Maybe coz you guys are tired of being rejected that's why pushing the responsibility on us girls now.


I agree on that one. I mean the princess dream thing.

Personally i think that if you want a girl to approach you, you'll need to play your own cards right. You need to send out the right signals to show that you're not just like any other guys that have approached her before and ended up being someone who wasnt worth the trouble at all. Agree?
Girls can send out subtle signals..why cant we guys do the same? But of course, we havta learn to pick up on signals as well.

And obviously its all context dependent, some girls know what they want and they go for it..so there are actually girls out there who approach guys whom they are interested in. While some girls need to be "nudged" before they are willing to make a move.
So what we need to understand is what they are looking for, and to show them that you're different..because obviously, even us guys dont go for girls that seem mediocre to us.


ATTRACTION, SIGNALS and BALLS.

Agree ??

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