It's been quite some time since i last posted any entry.
Well, u can't blame me. It's the Chinese New Year. The
biggest event of the year for the chinese.
Ironically, i heard some comments about this CNY : There's just a lack of festiveness in the air. It is not as festive and merry as it used to be anymore. It's getting quieter every year.
I do agree on the part that it is not as festive and merry as it used to be, to me at least.
Neh, i'm not talking about the fire crackers and those beautiful dazzling sky crackers...or whatever you call those.
I'm referring to the sense of excitement that people emits when a celebration is near.
Is it because i'm getting older every year that CNY has lost it's magic hence becoming just another holiday to my working life?
Or it is because my aunties and uncles makes my CNY more miserable each year when giving me red packets while loudly saying
"This is the last year i'm gonna give you ang pow. Next year no more ang pow. When are you getting married?"Geez..... What a creative way to enlighten my holiday mood.
With a blink of an eye, the New year celebration is over.
*Blink*
It's nearing towards the end of March. Now, what have i done in the past weeks...
Nothing interesting.
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Nothing interesting in comparison to my work place now. It's like a dark cloud blankets me the moment i step into the office everyday, dreading something bad might happen. Something like this can only happens when there's an unwelcomed presence in the office.
I'm not talking about GHOST lah, okay??
It's pure flesh and warm blood i'm talking about.
It's a human being for pete's sake.
Okay, what is so dreadful about this presence?? Well, this presence holds the power that can diminish your presence. Worst still, this presence can replace your existance in the office. Now, you know what i'm talking about or not??
Day by day, the power of the presence grows and i feel suffocated by it (the power). Deep down inside, you know that someday, you will find yourself no longer useful to the company. With each passing day, the presence is taking away some of your work. Learning new tricks and digging knowledgable information is what the presence is doing. So ever happy about oneself existance in this office, the presence actually forgets that it's a threat to others.
The only solution to this situation is to explore other opportunities. I shall have to exploit each opportunity that falls upons me. In situation like this, i'm gonna get crazy very fast. Soon enough, you will see that i need to take prescribed medicine. Popping 3 tablets into my mouth twice a day. That might be the only reliever to my miserable life.
No, i cannot eliminate the presence. You have yet to know the true POWER behind this presence. The presence's existance is being granted by the UTMOST POWERFUL presence of this whole working block. That is the founder of the company. Our director.
So you see???
Somehow, i wish i have an uncle who owns a company too
When you already find that work is not rewarding in your life, then there it comes a huge barrier in front of you, blocking your view of the already not-so-bright prospect ahead.
With the fact that everyone close to you is leaving the company, it top-up the stress. Maybe it's just me being sensitive. Maybe i'm being too pessimistic. Maybe i made the whole thing up in my mind. Maybe it's nothing at all and i'm freaking myself out. For all the Maybes, maybe it's just what it is.
So what shall i do
I think i know......
I'll visit a shrink tomorrow.
Labels: Down hill
